Fucking everything, one goat at a time!

Chick Tracts are to blame!

See they're taking our guns so we can't shoot'em for Jesus!

Perhaps I’ve been watching too much cable news, or spending too much time online, but I’ve become furious with the absolute horse shit that is coming out of the insane mouths of people like Sarah Palin and Sharron Angle. The absolutely bat shit crazy/paranoid conspiracy theories of Michelle Bachman, the extreme right views on immigration and vengeful, hateful attitude of so-called Christians towards homosexuals. Actual politicians calling for the constitution to be changed and the 14th Amendment to be done away with, while the same assholes cry about how much they love the founding fathers in the same breath. It all sounded familiar, but I knew that not all of these maniacs had read Behold A Pale Horse. Then I remembered where I had heard such lunacy before; Tracts! You remember these things right. During the mid to late 1990s they were everywhere. Published by Chick Publications out of Ontario, CA. They were drawn by Jack Chick a failed actor  who drew these things for thirty years. On the web site it states that he was “called home to our lord” in 1998. Although several of his cartoons suggest that spirits don’t rise up until the rapture. They were like Tijuana Bibles for religious nut-bags. They always warned of the coming apocalypse, WWIII, and the rise of the Beast! The decried the loss of freedom under Billy Clint, and stated that anyone who wasn’t born-again would be left behind. They were cute, and drawn to look like they were taken straight from Mad Magazine. They featured tons of misquoted bible verses and always ended with damning the reader. For me and my friends they seemed like a harmless joke, not in any way to be taken seriously. I had dozens of hem, at one point I had a whole shoe box filled with the damn things.

Quick they're rounded up the true believers

I lost my collection somewhere along the way and almost forgot about them. Until it dawned on me that perhaps, there were some kids out there who didn’t think they were a joke. People so fucking scared of anything that wasn’t white and Christian that the pathetic cartoons in these stupid things actually rang true. They took this shit seriously and it motivated them to get into politics so that they could stave off the coming apocalypse. Now 15 or so years later they are running for office and organizing tea parties with their other paranoid friends. They are influencing policies and fucking up all of our lives with their twisted version of biblical truth. How on earth did it come to this. We barely survived the false born-again bullshit of George Bush, but now these psychos are on the march again. Even more twisted and fueled by their hatred of  Americas first black president. Make no mistake these dick-wads are not mad at Obama for being too liberal or trying to take away there guns, because lets face it he ain’t that liberal and no moves have been made to take away anybodies guns.

It looks like Jesus is coming back to sing show-tunes! Not again Jesus!

So basically until the rapture we're all just hanging out underground, but when Jesus calls we'll be zombies?

These fears are not based in reality, what they are afraid of is the fact that he isn’t white. When Bush and Cheney stripped away half of the rights of Americans with their so-called Patriot act not one of these freedom loving Tea-Baggers said a fucking word, not one single peep was heard. When we were lied to and manipulated into a war that had absolutely nothing to do with 9/11 no one opened their mouth, the waved their flags and bought SUVs. Since the election of President Obama these pieces of shit white supremacist hide behind some false love of the constitution and cry that the President of the United States is not even a legal citizen! It’s all so absurd it would make me laugh if it wasn’t so fucking true. These dipshits seem to be everywhere screaming louder than anyone else, while the overwhelming majority of people who got Obama elected sit on their ass and say nothing. I don’t know whats happening to America right now, but it ain’t good. Perhaps it’s the death throes of the fascist right, perhaps it truly is the march toward Armageddon. I can’ t help but think back to those stupid Chick tracts and think this is somehow their fault. 

Hater of God! Gotta clear that one up before the big day!

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